Slice the tofu in half and pan fry it with a small amount of oil until browned on both sides. Remove from pan and transfer to the fridge to cool. While the tofu is cooling, prepare the remaining ingredients.

When the tofu is room temperature, remove it from the fridge and place it in a food processor. Pulse the tofu into small pieces that resemble a ground meat texture.

Add the tofu to a large bowl with the remaining ingredients and mix well. Once combined, place in the refrigerator to chill completely.